Posted by Or… Twerpy-looking teenagers don’t have the chops to stick with me
I was driving home from a friend’s house last night when a black Buick SUV started tailgating me in the streets before getting onto the Parkway. I find this sort of behavior to be incredibly annoying because I wasn’t exactly driving slowly and I was also stuck behind someone else.
So I get onto the ramp, still being tailgated and sped up to get this guy off my arse. But he’s putting up a good fight. As we neared the Fort Pitt Tunnels, he (instinctively) got in the left lane, probably expecting to pass me up. But I saw that there were more cars in the left left so I stayed in the right lane. He came up level with me in the tunnels and I looked over to see that he was in fact a teenagey douchebag with affectedly ruffled hair (like Ashton Kutcher used to have). He looked over at me and it was on.
Coming out of the Fort Pitt tunnel, driving towards the Squirrel Hill tunnels, douchebag keeps trying tailgating me despite the fact that I’m going 75+. He pulled ahead on the right lane; a mistake going into second tunnels. I pulled ahead in the left lane. We traded places going back and forth through Edgewood.
Pulling around the bend after Edgewood before Forest Hills, he pulled into the far right lane and increased to what seemed like 80mph. At this point, I considered whether it was worth it to keep going given the speeding ticket boost. Hey, I pay for my own insurance; speed is money.
But pride got the better of me and I wasn’t about to let a youngster beat me so I decided it was time to dust his ass. So I shifted to auto-stick, dropped to 4th-speed and gunned it up to 5th-speed. Jagoff had no answer.
Moral of the story: Don’t mess with an Audi if you’re a li’l teenage douchebag who’s driving mommy’s SUV.
I imagine that shift from 4th to 5th was worth every penny of every repair you’ve had to do.